Tips in Writing Sincere Condolence Messages

Losing someone so dear to us is like jumping off a cliff where bed of nails are waiting, it is like walking in small pieces of broken glass perpetually. Death is considered to be the most painful event in  persons life. It may take several months or years or even a lifetime recovering from. Nevertheless, hearing comforting words from other people is can be uplifting too.

If you happen to be have a connection to people who have been experiencing dark times within his/her family or friends then this article will be very helpful in guiding you on how to write sincere condolences that would surely alleviate the pain a person may be suffering.


The following are the things you need to consider in writing sincerely:

  • Keep your message short but do not compromise the quality of being thoughtful. Having a long message can be very dragging to the reader, it would keep him/her lonelier.
  • Respect the religious beliefs of the person who  experienced the loss. Never try to mention anything that is against their belief, encourage and say something good about it instead. Example: “You  are with Allah now”, “Jesus Christ has saved the soul of your deceased beloved so there is nothing to worry about the fear of hell”.
  • Offer anything you can do that might help them but do not mention financial help or the debt of the deceased neither. Example: “If you need help, do not hesitate to call me” , “In any chance you might need help, I am just a call away”.
  • Keep it personal so the  person experiencing the loss would somehow feel they have someone who can make them feel at home and someone who is  with them in times of painful circumstances.
  • Use a stationery in writing, a special paper will do.

The following are the things you need to avoid in writing a sincere condolence message:

  • Being too wordy making it lengthy.
  • Do not explain and blab more about the death. This wouldn’t be helping the family who experienced the loss especially if you will mention that death is part of God’s plan or the heavens needed him because he is a very nice person on earth. This is not helpful in the healing process.
  • Prevent from comparing your loss, their loss and the loss of other people because mainly, different people has different ways of handling the pain. If you would try comparing, this might sound insulting to them.
  • Do not share private information regarding the deceased in respect to his/her private life, he/she may not have revealed it and also, it is very improper to share confidential information in a condolence message.
  • Do not express relief and try to convey that the family should focus on the brighter side. No death is considered positive or a blessing in disguise.

Expressing your thoughts and sympathy to the person or family who  is suffering the death of their loved one is a very priceless act that is writing it properly and sincerely is a huge deal should’t be taken for granted.


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